After the execution, Canton prison, China

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Omaha, Nebraska: Science helps Pakistani man to double his penis size with testosterone injections

Science is one of humanity’s most interesting enterprises because it is uniquely positioned to answer certain fundamental questions, such as: What is life? How old is the universe? aaaaaand how do I double my penis size? Let’s consider that last one for a second. Just how does one double one’s penis size anyway?

Now, I’m SURE all our male readers are perfectly happy with their penis size, and have no feelings of inadequacy whatsoever about their manhood. It’s not like that’s part of the universal male experience or anything like that.

All the same, let’s assume there was some man out there somewhere, who for some bizarre reason wanted to make his penis even bigger. What can science tell this man about his junk?

A recent case study managed to shed some light on the nascent field of giant cock science: a Pakistani man was having some hormonal issues, including a lack of body hair, an inability to grow a full beard, and a less-than-average amount of morning erections.

It should also be mentioned – and there’s no good way to put this – the doctors noted that the man had a seriously tiny weenie for a man of his age, about the size of a child’s.

It turns out the poor guy had an undiagnosed case of hypogonadism, which is a condition linked to low testosterone production. Testosterone is considered to be “a critical hormone for sexual, cognitive, and body function and development”. As part of his treatment, he got a series of testosterone injections over several months.

And his penis doubled in size. Doubled! As did his balls.

Hopefully he felt a little bit better after getting that result. No doubt there are many men in the world who would pay tens of thousands of dollars for a series of injections that would give them a similar result.

In any case, testosterone injections are serious stuff, and aren’t meant to be used for cosmetic purposes. The endocrine system is crucial to many aspects of health, and is linked to many different kinds of cancer.

So keep that in mind before you go trying to find an intravenous testosterone drip for your johnson.

And always remember fellas: it’s not about the size of the boat; it’s about the motion of the ocean.


It is the secret dream of every Swedish or German woman to marry a black men, or at least have sex with a black man. Every smart young African man should migrate to Europe. Free money, nice house, good sex!


Japan hikes jail terms for rape in sex law overhaul

Japan hiked minimum jail terms for rapists and widened the definition of sexual assault victims to include men for the first time today as part of sweeping revisions to century-old sex crime legislation. Lawmakers decided unanimously to update the 1907 statute to impose tougher penalties on sex attackers and make prosecutions easier, as they look to boost Japan’s low number of convictions.

The changes — long called for by victim advocates –raise the minimum prison term for those convicted of rape to five years, up from the present three. The changes also means victims will no longer have to file a complaint before a sexual assault prosecution can go ahead. That current requirement is seen as a major reason for the underreporting of rape cases in Japan.

Sexual assault victims for the first time will also include men, with the definition of “rape” dramatically widened. The law will also make it easier to prosecute parents and guardians suspected of abusing their children.

“I hope that these revisions will mean more appropriate punishment and draw public attention to the reality of sex crimes,” Jun Yamamoto, a 43-year-old who was molested by her father as a child, reportedly told parliament.

Victims and their supporters said that the current 110-year-old law is out of date and that penalties are too lenient. The number of rape cases in Japan recognised by police declined to some 1,200 in 2015 from more than 2,000 a decade ago, according to police.

But data from a Justice ministry study group found that nearly 75 percent of sex crime victims do not seek criminal punishment for perpetrators. Support groups said victims tend to hesitate to take legal action as they are traumatised and feel embarrassed to speak out.


Phoenix, Arizona: Average penis size around the world revealed – but how do UK men measure-up?

Whether you are well endowed or lacking in the trouser department, most guys have wondered whether their todger measures up to the average.

In fact it can make lots of men self-conscious but the results of a new study show that, unsurprisingly, lots of guys lie about the size of their manhood.

A survey by dating website SaucyDates.com asked men from different countries to estimate the length of their erect penis while asking women about the erect size of their last sexual partner.

Then researchers revealed the nationalities that are most prone to lying about penis size – and which ones are the most truthful.

It turns out Australian lads are most likely to overestimate how much they’re really packing Down Under.

Aussie men reported their average penis size as 7.09 inches, but the Sheilas say a normal guy’s schlong measures 5.58 inches.

But how did the Brits measure up?

Lads from the UK reckoned their penises measure 6.89 inches long but women think they’re smaller.

Ladies said guys fall shorter than that, revealing that men tend to be packing 6.64 inches downstairs.

And Canadians were found to be the most modest about their goods.

Men estimated the regular schlong to be 6.84 inches in length while ladies boasted of the biggest sized schlong of all – coming in at 6.96 inches.

Researchers said: “If you ask a man the size of their penis in general you should subtract 5.6% off the total length, mathematically speaking, of course.

“But if he claims to be 8 inches or more then you can cancel that call to trade descriptions or better business bureau.

“If you are looking for a monstrous-sized penis then you should focus your efforts on UK men as 1 in 20 will have enough inches to need a bigger ruler.

“If you want to play it safe and go for a good all round size and infallible honestly then Canada is the country for you and avoid the Americas or Australians who think lying increases your size like Pinocchio.”


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